Blessed are the blessed

for they shall be.

Did you ever notice that some people have all the luck and other people seem accident prone? I wonder about that. The good books I'm reading lately are saying that we are what we imagine we are. So, I must think I'm a dingbat, cause I forget to do some things I thought I wanted to do. I think I sabotage myself, because I'm afraid of being a success. Maybe I was taught that that would be bad, not overtly, but subtly, like with derision and sarcasm. (I had to learn it from somewhere)

I guess, then, if I want a different life, I have to think differently. If I can't imagine myself healthy, wealthy, and wise, how will I ever be flourishing in my beach house while I scribe my secrets of joyous living? I could scold myself for being a dolt, cuz I missed most of the class, or I could have the spunk to extract all I can from and instill as much of myself as I can into the remaining minutes. I remember talking to a mentor of mine about how I was noticing how annoyed my friend was making me and that I knew our friends are our mirrors, so I must be annoyed with myself and then I was more annoyed for being annoyed and annoying and I don't see how I wasn't annoying her, but she just looked at me and smiled beatifically and said, "Wow, look at all the awareness you have." I just sat in silent amazement and then nodded in agreement. I am so dang aware. I do notice every little thing I do "wrong".

I recently decided to start noticing things I do "right". I love my kids well. I make a nice quiche. I can sing pretty competently. I've composed quite a few cool pieces of music. I love to write a good story, and people tell me they enjoy them. I make a mean bowl. I have all sorts of great ideas about how to improve the world and our lives...

I feel better and more successful already.

I am going to imagine drinking a tequila sunrise in my hammock in the shade next to the ocean, now...



Yours,


D



P.S. If you care to join me, drinks are on the house.